Days 2& 3 "The Hangover"

     We read the Whole30 timeline in depth and still I felt just a bit blindsided today when I found myself getting angry and frustrated with the simplest things. Things I encounter daily, behaviors that people are known for, pretty much EVERYTHING! I knew, I expected, and still strangely surprised. To the point that I almost wanted someone to provoke me just so I could unleash on them!
     The cravings have been fine, nothing unbearable and not really even anything specific. I am, however, VERY persuadable when it comes to food stuff. So talking to a coworker about a nice chai latte or a kitchen that is engulfed with the smell of brownies baking is still a bit hard. The food we are eating is still tasting good and keeping my interest, which also helps a lot. Here's a list of what I've eaten:
Day 2: (Super hungry today)
Pre-workout- Handful of nuts and dry fruit
Post workout- Apple and almond butter
Breakfast- 2 eggs w/hot sauce, 2 bacon, baked sweet potato w/ghee and cinnamon
Snack: 2 1oz meatballs and 2 strip bacon
Lunch: Sonoma Chicken Salad lettuce wraps, larabar, apple berry la Croix sparkling water
Snack: Epic bison bar
Dinner: Slow roasted pork Mexican bowl (sautéed red cabbage, cilantro,onion, tomato, avocado)

Day 3:
Breakfast- 2 Eggs, 2 Bacon, Sweet potato w/ghee & cinnamon
Snack: 3 strips bacon
Lunch: Beef & Turkey chili w/tons of veggies
Snack: small handful mixed nuts and some grapes
Dinner: Chicken Cacciatore

    Yea, I know... not supposed to be snacking but I'm just so hungry sometimes! So it's not too bad so far. More to come!
  -Jamie

Dawns take on days 2 and 3..

Surprisingly, they are not as bad as I expected.  Like Jamie said, the food we are eating is quite tasty, but I miss my snacks!  I noticed that I woke up with a headache yesterday (typical hangover, right) and then shit just went downhill! Little things, but enough to irritate me.  Then I couldn't sleep last night and became irrational. Very irrational. So I went to the couch at 2am where I slept until 5:15am and then became a happy camper.
Tonight at work I brought in 'snacks' for my group. It consisted of chips, salsa, and queso. I could get done on queso.  As I watched the group eat the treats, I snacked on carrots and had to remind myself why I was doing this.  I am doing it for so many reasons that one day I will write down, but for now I am happy where this is going.  Friday I have a training for work where they cater breakfast and lunch so that is what I am focused on now...Until then, happy/healthy eating...and onto day 4!

Whole 30 Day 1 complete!

     So here we are at the end of day1... not too bad! The food was good, I picked up a meal plan client, and got my ass back to the gym! Feeling good, motivation it up there, I'm excited, no complaints... YET! So, if you're not familiar with the Whole 30 program, you can definitely hit up their website (www.whole30.com) for more information, but the basic jyst of it is: NO gluten, NO grains/legumes, NO dairy, NO alcohol, etc. So, basically 30 days of super strict clean eating. The part that'll likely be the hardest is going from a plan that encouraged snacks between meals, making 5-6 small meals a day to one that promotes a 3 meal way of doing things. Today was definitely a hungry day, so there were small approved snacks to fill the gaps until I adjust.
     Here's what I ate today...
Pre-workout: small closed handful of raw mixed nuts, water
Post-workout: apple and almond butter
Breakfast: 2 eggs, 2 bacon, baked sweet potato w/cinnamon and ghee
Snack: Blueberry larabar
Lunch: Big salad w/homemade tarragon vinaigrette
Snack: Epic turkey bar
Dinner: Shrimp "tacos" with tomatillo slaw and avocado

Had a couple cravings for sweets after meals and a soda in the afternoon, but not giving in to that stuff, especially on day 1 hahaha.

My plan is to write a little every day just to chronicle my journey and the details of the 30 days. Bare with it! Thanks for reading.
  -Jamie

One thing after another...

    Ever feel like no matter how hard you try it just doesn't work? Or like the harder you try the more life throws at you? This is where I'm at right now. Not necessarily today or this week, but right now this moment. I'm feeling sorry for myself and completely defeated. BUT... here I sit typing this "confession" to whoever may read this hoping that by letting goof the words and the feelings it will free me to get back to my motivation and my goals.
     As I mentioned in my previous post, I've been trying to sort out some medical stuff, which resulted in a prescription for a very common drug that I've taken other forms of before with no issue. Well, this time the dose was considerably higher and attacked me with side effects. The worst of it all was dizziness that had me unable to stand up straight on Monday, and having to call out of work (which I can't even remember the last time that happened!). This was after a kitchen accident on Sunday where I lost a fight to a mandolin, which cost me the tip of my finger. Already feeling crappy... So, these 2 things had me unable to start the week with crossfit, which also makes me unhappy. With no idea about the side effects and trying to figure out what the hell else is wrong with me, Dawn started doing some research and determined it's the meds. I stopped taking them, and am currently waiting out the time release factor.
     Meanwhile, there was Easter on Sunday, my birthday on Wednesday, and who knows how many other excuses I could come up with for why I've already failed at my 30 day commitments. But ultimately... no matter what I say the reasons were, it happened, and I moved on.
     Batch cooking this week was minimal, but we made a batch of chili that was really veg heavy, cooked up some sausages with peppers and onions, made some oatmeal, and left room for things like the fantastic taco dinner one of my students made for my birthday dinner. We have made plans for the weekend, that of course have food and drink involved, and I'm not sure how I feel about it... guilt? disappointment? apathy? disregard? I dunno.
     Meal plans intrigue me and dietary information or claims that all these different chefs or trainers or celebrities or doctors make grab my interest, and while I'm not opposed to trying any of them or all of them (partly for the experience and partly to find what works best for me), I feel like I'm always explaining my food stuff to someone or talking about what new plan I'm on this week. It gets frustrating and it's hard to try to maintain some sort of social calendar without food or drink being involved.
   So... that's where I'm at with things right now, and it's not a great place to be, so I'm hoping this little venting helps with that. I am always open to thoughts or opinions or words of encouragement, so feel free....
        -Jamie

Bloggin' ain't easy!!

     And just like that it's been 3 months since either of us has written anything... sorry. So what has happened in that time?? Ugh... what hasn't!?! Dawn has found herself in a job that is right in line with the dream she had for her career, she has backed off of both boxing and crossfit due to injury (tendonitis in her wrist and thumb), has signed up for her next 5k, and has realized that with the season change it's now time for a new smaller wardrobe. I think that about covers the bulk of it. As for me... Still doing crossfit 3-4 times a week (and holy crap am I getting stronger!), am counting the days until my Spartan race, I have registered for school, and have also had some wardrobe changes. All in all, things are good... I have some health issues we are currently trying to figure out, but the results so far are steering away from anything serious, so that's good.
     So... the weight situation is a touchy subject... we have both been at a plateau for almost 2 months, which is SUPER frustrating! We have both seen changes in our body composition, and that's great, but sometimes you just wanna see a different number on that damn scale!!! With that, I've made the decision that we are going to try something a little different: 30 days of clean living. No eating out, no alcohol, no gluten, no dairy, minimal sugar, etc. Worth a shot, right?!? It couldn't have been timed better though, since I'm on spring break and able to cook fresh every night rather than batch cooking, but that's only one week, so back at it on Sunday.
     This week we are keeping it pretty simple: spinach shakes for breakfast every day, hard boiled eggs and clementine for snack 1, deli meat lettuce wraps for lunch, raw veg w/guacamole cup for snack 2, protein & veg for dinner. Also trying to grill as much as possible! Just because lol. Starting to look for recipes now for next week, will tell ya all about it as soon as I know.
     Now for the "other stuff"... last week there was a WOD that absolutely kicked my ass, and it was awesome! It was a Tuesday, which are always benchmark workouts; the ones named after heroes or have some level of status in the crossfit community. I was one of the last 2 people working while all the fit people had finished and were gathering their things to head out, I kept my head up and gave it everything I had. As I looked around, everyone had stayed... they were cheering on those of us not yet done. It felt good... they knew my name, they knew I could do this even if I didn't, they knew I needed that in that moment. I dug in deep and found every last bit of grit left in my and as I pushed through my final thruster, I dropped the bar and feel to the ground. I burst into tears and let go of everything that had ever held me back. It was that moment that I've read about in so many other weight loss journeys, but never had my own. THIS was my breakthrough. I grabbed my stuff and walked towards the exit, thanking everyone that was telling me "good job" as I left. I got into my car and began a full on sobbing scene. It felt good, it gave me clarity, it made me realize things about myself that I had never thought possible. That moment has help me set new goals, hit new PRs, lift heavier, dig deeper. LOVE IT!
    Thanks for reading, I know that was a lot of catching up, but I will definitely try to keep up on this thing more now that I have things to write about.
      -Jamie

Measurements, Motivation, and Meal plans

     Good morning!! So here we are on the last Monday of 2014... New Years day is on Thursday and with that comes all the resolutions and new diets or exercise programs for the majority of people. I always try to say I'm not doing any of that and I'm just doing my own thing without all the dumb broken promises to myself. Most of that is just me trying to justify or feel better about all the failed attempts of my past. So, every year it gets a little harder or a little more annoying to think about the same stuff. I am really kinda sick of it and would love to have a new years where I don't have to think about weight or diet or exercise. Or to still be sitting here thinking "maybe next year". Even when you pretend it's not an issue or something that's on your mind, it doesn't go away. It's like when someone mentions the amount of food you eat or looks at your plate with a judgmental look and you find yourself wondering if skinny people feel this way. But... no matter what your weight situation is or what your hang ups are, no one will ever judge you as hard as yourself.
     Now... this whole motivation thing... what is it, where does it come from, how do you make it stay?? These are things I have wondered for pretty much forever! Once you start something and pour your whole self into it it's easy to ride out the momentum and keep it going, and even easier when you begin to see results. But what happens when you start to get a little cloudy in your vision, or when you take a little time off, or when things just hit a random stand still. As I sit here in between holidays knowing that my food choices have been shit and that my gym schedule has completely fallen apart, I just don't know how to light the fire back up. I know I love what I was doing, and I know I was seeing better results than I ever have before, but for some reason I'm just in a funk.
     I don't really do well with free time or sitting still, and I am currently in the middle of a 2 week break from work. So.... that puts me in this weird emotional spot where I just lose my motivation. I hate it, I'm aware of it, and yet I still let it happen. I am a creature of habit and do best when I have a routine, so set schedules and strict meal plans all work really well for me, but the slightest change in plans can offset everything I'm doing. Weird how it works, but its always been that way for me. Anyone have any input on this?? Suggestions on how to keep it going or get back on??
     Speaking of strict meal plans... we just signed up to follow a slightly more intense version of the fit2fat2fitplan we had been following before the holidays. It starts on the 4th, so this week will be the prep week, which usually involves purging the house of bad stuff and stocking up on the good stuff. Luckily for us, we've already been doing this so it's just the holiday crap we have to get rid of and Saturday we will shop for the new menu to batch cook on Sunday. If you have any interest in checking this thing out, the new plan is at 2fitathome.com, the free version we were doing before is at fit2fat2fit.com.
      Last but not least.... as I've been promising, here is the chart of our measurements so far. You can see that there are some solid results, but also some stand stills. There is still far too much weight and inches to be lost for there to be a plateau for either of us. Something definitely needs to be shaken up here in the next couple days to get this thing going full force into the new year. So I guess a resolution needs to be made, but rather than some empty promise or putting a number on things, I will keep it a bit simpler: No more excuses!!!! That is the best thing I can do for myself at this point.
     Happy New Year to each and every one of you that reads this. Thank you for your continued support. Be safe, and take good care of yourselves.
   -Jamie

DAWN	20-Sep	10/17	Diff.	24-Nov	Diff.	27-Dec	Diff.
Neck:	16	16	0	15.25	0.75	15.25	0.75
Bust:	50	49	1	49	1	47	3
Waist:	48.5	46	2.5	46	2.5	45	3.5
Hips:	57	54	3	54	3	53.5	3.5
Right Arm:	19	18	1	16	3	15.5	3.5
Right Thigh:	30.5	27.5	3	27.5	3	26	4.5
Right Calf:	21	20	1	19.75	1.25	19	2
							(-20.75)
Weight:	286.8	284.2	2.6	276	10	276	10
JAMIE	9/20	17-Oct	Diff.	24-Nov	Diff.	27-Dec	Diff.
Neck:	15.5	15	0.5	14.5	1	14.5	1
Bust:	46	45	1	45	1	45	1
Waist:	42.5	41	1.5	41	1.5	40	2.5
Hips:	48.5	47.5	1	47.5	1	46	2.5
Right Arm:	17	15	2	15	2	14	3
Right Thigh:	30	28.5	1.5	28.5	1.5	28.5	1.5
Right Calf:	19	18.5	0.5	18	1	17.5	1.5
							(-13)
Weight:	236	229	7	227	9	227	9

Oh heeeyyyy!!

       Holy crap... it's already been 20 days since we last posted! It's amazing how easily life gets away from you. Holidays, new job for Dawn, sick people, sick pup, new goals, new achievements, etc... and here we are with New Years in sight! The end of an exciting and amazing year, and a solid outlook on what's to come.
     This Christmas was so unlike any other, and yet so much better in a different way! We usually both have our interests and things that we want for gifts that include kitchen toys for me and makeup for Dawn. This year included things like compression shorts and sweatbands as well as a foam roller and a 20lb slam ball. What a difference a year makes!
    Crossfit at the new gym has been amazing, we are both getting stronger and have better endurance. I can do 20" box jumps no problem now! AND... I did a series of 11 clapping pushups during a workout on xmas eve! I LOVE THIS SHIT! haha It just feels good to be so focused on health and strength instead of weight and getting skinny.
     Unfortunately, Dawn hasn't been boxing as much as she would like... she's been too busy loving her new job! Scheduling conflicts suck, but she is still kicking ass and trying to find that balance. She is also looking into a 10k next month. I'm just really glad she is finding her groove in life and proud of all she is accomplishing both personally and professionally.
    We sent out the most obnoxiously cute holiday cards this year that involved us getting dressed up and going to the gym to play around with poses with equipment. Hopefully you got one and loved it, if not... that sucks! HAHA

     Anyway....I'm babbling, but wanted to post a quick update and not neglect this thing anymore. Measurements tomorrow, batch cooking on Sunday, and New Years this week... no resolutions this year for me. Why? Because I've already started and made my own commitments and promises to myself. I WILL, however, be making attempts to keep up on these posts more. Thanks for reading and happy holidays to you all!
      -Jamie

Seatbelts and Douchebags

If you never had to ask for a seatbelt extender, this is for you. An inside glimpse at that world from a chunky chic.

When I first flew years ago I was nervous about the seats. I wasn't at my heaviest, but still very overweight. When I boarded the plan and attempted to clasp the seatbelt, it would not budge. I smushed, pushed, and did anything I could do to get that damn thing to close, to no avail. With apprehension I approached the flight attendant to ask for an extender. You could see the look of digust in her eye as she handed it to me. If only she knew the disgust I felt for myself for having to ask. Luckily, I would fly with my wife so she didn't mind (or wouldn't admit) if my thighs went on her side of the seat. I minded however. I hated it. I hated flying and never wanted to get on a plane again.

My next issue was the bathroom. I have a small bladder to begin with and when I get nervous, I'm screwed. Anytime I fly I will not eat or drink until I have gone into the airplane bathroom, closed the door, and sat down. I have never not fit, but it still scares me. 

So today was a flying day. I have worked my butt off these last few months but still had fear of not fitting in the seat. I found out I was the only one in my aisle before boarding so I was slightly relieved that my thighs wouldn't touch the neighbors. As I boarded the plane I told the flight attendant I may need an extender. I like to forewarn them before the plane gets to busy. I took my seat, took a breath, and grabbed the seatbelt. It clasped. I wasnt squished and had room to move around. I was ecstatic. The flight attendant walked by shortly after and asked if I needed the extender. Proudly, I said nope I am comfortable. She smiled. I smiled. In fact, I smiled the whole way to Chicago because I knew when I get home I am checking off another box on my bucket list.

The next flight was from Chicago to Hartford and I heard the plane was small. Okay, its really fucking small. One seat on one side, and 2 seats on the other. I approached my seat which was the aisle of the 2 seater and some douchebag dickhead was in it. I decided to take the one seat side rather than cause a commotion.  Once again, I held my breath and grabbed both ends..OMG, it fit. And I fit. In this tiny lil seat with armrests on both sides that were not moveable. Sidenote, the douchebag just smiled at me and I want to punch him but I'm too proud.

So as the plane is about to take off, the attendant asks someone in row 1-7 to sit in the back to distribute weight. Douchebag kinda looks at me, I look at him and remain seated. The guy behind me ends up moving. Screw you people. My butt is secure in this seat, 5A, and thats where it is staying. Then, I tested the bathroom. Yup, I fit. Phew, mise well pee while I am in here..and hang out. Why?? Became I mutha fuckin can. Because I can close the door and do a pirouette if I wanted to. Because I work hard for who I am becoming. And because I am no longer that person that needs an extender. Ya know what else?? I wear the seatbelt even when the pilot says you dont have to!!

Bucket list item complete. Day is great. I am happy. Love and health to all. Except the douchebag. He still is annoying  me.