Is this what I want??

I ran into an old friend a bit ago who has not seen me since my weightloss.  She commented how I looked good but then asked "is this what you want?"  I assume implying did I want to lose weight or did I get an awful illness that affected my health.  I smiled and said - absolutely, this is what I want.  I want this because of so many reasons.  Here's just a few:

• to not be out of breath when climbing stairs
• to have a better chance of living a long life
• to not worry about fitting into seats at restaurants
• to have more than a handful of stores to shop in
• to sleep better
• to enjoy life fully with no restrictions

and so many more.

Previously, Jamie talked about fat pride.  Something that I also have a hard time with.  Yes, I love myself and am proud of the goals I have recently achieved (moving to CO, buying a house, graduating from grad school, etc).  However, I do not like what limitations I put on myself due to my weight.  I do not have pride in my body.  I love the fact that I am 'healthy' and my legs keep me walking and my back keeps me upright, but I do not like the fact that my body is covered in fat.  Fat that will eventually kill me if I don't change my lifestyle.  Fat that has defined me for the last 25+ years.  I was always that fat kid.  My blood pressure is great, my cholesterol is unbelievable but do you see any fat elderly people?  NO...because they are DEAD.  So I am sorry I cannot have fat pride.  it is nothing I am prideful for.  there is nothing to be prideful for.  I have Dawn pride, but I am certainly not happy with where I was.  I am happy for the people that are proud of their weight and their size.  However, I do not believe for one moment that they are truly happy with themselves.  That is only my opinion of course. 

On a positive side note,
this month I am down 11 1/2 inches. that is almost a foot...holy cow...and I fit into a pair of jeans off the rack at old navy.  a size 18. I haven't been a size 18 in a long long long time.
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